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Tuesday, June 26, 2012

The Reason

So I wrote a status yesterday that is so true

 "Not taking life so seriously actually takes away the confusion that there never even was." --- C.B.

There isn't any confusion. I know who I am.
I know exactly what I need.

"If you are afraid of dying, 
you might want to re-evaluate how you are living." 

For those of you who doubt me.. Don’t. You’re wasting time on that feeling. Have a little more faith

This blog post is about the reason I am deciding to take time for myself and putting an end 
what no longer grows me as a person. 
(a job and a lifestyle that didn't quite fit)

Before I start I want all of you to know first and foremost, My decision didn’t happen over night. This took about a year of careful thought and budgeting. I am always a careful and diligent planner. (Thanks, mom) 

I felt like a put my brain on a shelf to collect dust.
 I need to be utilized in my talents.

  These are the reasons why:
  • Too much pressure and too little opportunity to grow.  
  • The job itself is just not a topic id ever even think about exploring in my own free time.
  •  It's hard to be enthusiastic about a job that you didn't truly choose. I haven’t even had the chance to use my TRUE talents and abilities.
  • I couldn't get away from the pressure, so my health started to dwindle a bit. (I was not eating regularly because I was so stressed and anxious all or most of the day) My doctor told me I lost 10 lbs in a year and there was no where for me to lose it from in the first place. My hands/wrist were also aching so bad from the repetitive motions.  My eyes were dry and they'd sting.
  •  I became tired in all the ways a person could be tired.
  • Emotionally I was distraught. I need lots of human interaction in my day, and they moniter you like a hawk... You arent allowed to get up and roam freely.
  • Everyday, even going to the bathroom... they wonder why you are up from your desk.
  • If the company's values and principles are in conflict with your own, youll struggle on a consistent basis... I've learned that now.
  • When values or principles are in conflict, people may sometimes experience a sense of paralysis. That was me.
  •   The career --being a poor fit was causing me to feel anger, sorrow, or anxiety. I have anxiety as is..
  •  Overwork and stress -- no vacation in years will start to grate on you as a person.
  •   Family time and personal time.. Ive missed out on a lot of it through the years.

I use to tell ask myself "How bad does it get before you say enough?
Is it bad enough to make me leave finally?"

The answer is usually "Yes!" Unfortunately people may stay in these situations for so long that it affects their health. I was facing whether or not I should go on anti-depressants.

Here are ways of finding better fits. 

 Like I said in my last blog

First, make a list of your talents. 
Second, make a list of the type of articles or magazines that you read. 
Some of these talents and interests you want to keep as hobbies. Others are skills you 
want to sell. Third, make a list of things you'd like to learn that might be salable. 
These lists will help trigger opportunity thinking. 

Last, list other jobs and/or companies that might be interesting to you.
 How could you get the jobs or be able to work at the companies that interest you?

 Now I have time for:

- Taking care of my body 
(working out, eating healthy, sleeping)
-Having a style
-Reading books and visiting the library
-Taking pictures

- My family
-My Boyfriend 
-Learning new things
-Household maintenance
-Laundry and deep cleaning
Taking a vacation to where ever
-Fashion Shows
-Free events
-Lunch dates
-Long soaking baths
-Days at the pool
-One on one time with Bliss, my kitten
-puzzles and word games 

 -finding a job that fits me better, and possibly building a business living from home

 ^ isnt she gorgeous? Sad that shes no longer here but she left a legacy.
I want to be the type of person who has something to show for.. just like that.

I don't want a life that feels so constricted that I have to plan a huge vacation to get away. Everyday should have as much beauty as the last.

 I just feel like its time to restore my faith in life and that time is now...

Now is the time.

If I didnt do this now, when would I have?

Wait til im 40? 50? 60? No thanks.

 The recent:

I feel like there are many things that we are “pre-qualified” to do in life.. Use those gifts and youll feel most fulfilled.

Last but not least.. Like the new layout? Songs? :) Feedback!

Thanks for coming by and thanks for the support.

 Heres some things that inspired me.

Friday, June 15, 2012

Finding peace. Living now.

I have been meaning to write for quite some time now. So hi! again.

I have been trying to construct my ideas and thoughts. I realize I just want some feedback. I wish more people were willing to be open with their lives. I am not here to judge.. I have no room to.

 I just want to share the experience of life.. 

Whats better? 
A white background with black letters or a black background with white letters?

Yep..still working on the patience thing. I am so flustered with my playlist at the top of the page... is not actually playing music on blogs anymore..

AND ironically enough, my last blog was ABOUT MUSIC. 

It was about this topic^ 

well since there is no playlist..
If you cared to take a listen..The song I am currently listening to is at the link below:

Barbara Higbie - True Story amazing piano solo.

I have been so happy and excited about life.
 Refreshy button was pushed!

Here is me --headed off to the pool  (wearing the wrap my mom bought me in Hawaii!) This wrap is soo comfy and versatile. Love it :) Colorful.

What I have been telling myself about life is..

If its not one thing,

 its another..

Maybe 2011-2012 is the "Lets see how tough Cecily is time".
This past year has been a real challenge. 

2007 was a tough one also. 
But it has been made history now!!

Life is insane. You’re ALWAYS having something new thrown your way.. and its usually when you just caught your breath from the last “breath taking” moment in your life.Yeah, its overwhelming... but what can you do? Wake up in the morning and be glad you have so much ahead of you still.

People Live so fast. We go through so many tasks in our day without enjoying the moment. 

IF I have any advice, it is to:
Slow down long enough to listen to your body and soul.
I guarantee It has some things to tell you.

Nothing irritates me more than wasting time.
  Although some people say no time is wasted.. Time CAN be wasted and you should pay attention to where its going.

People have a lack of clarity in who they are.
 They have unclear purpose in why they are doing what they are doing.
 This really the root of where we need to dig. Its one reason why I think people should take breaks and do getaways.. because when you get away, it allows you to grow and do new things.

Many people seem to fall into ruts and then they don’t make changes with their lives. I am guilty of doing this… and then one day..   You just have to WAKE UP! And realize that you need to change something about your life. Fear holds us back.. along with just normal things.. like Money.  Economy. Security. Health Insurance.

Sadly, it winds up being mostly about money. 

(Anyway, before I go off on a rant about money) I just want to say... listen to what is in your hearts and remember your goals.

  •        Find out what you enjoy
  •        Find out what you can do to pursue that. 
  • Go with what you want.. say, "THIS IS MY LIFE… I AM DOING WHAT I WANT." As selfish as that sounds, I think if we don’t ever take risks in life then we wont get anywhere. 
  • Every risk that was significantly large has gotten me to a happier place. 

I know I talk a lot on this subject with life... But I feel that we cant have too many reminders to tell ourselves to go further and do more for yourselves..

 Because truly, you only have one life.

Strength comes through pain..

Every devastation I went through brought me to another amazing part of my life..

I wish I could list it all out right here on my blog.. It would be awful to bring all that out again though. It is history.

I hope to be that success story one day..

I have had many scary, tragic, and heartbreaking events..

And since we have no control over the bad..

and there is one life that is offered to you..
Don't waste it being unhappy.

I have a great sweet tooth right now....!! 

Look what I made on Memorial Day...

Easy and delicious..
Strawberries, Blueberries,Blackberries (I also like to put raspberries and golden raspberries in it) Cool Whip, and Angel food cake.. Allow the cool whip to be not frozen..just cold. Mix well and serve.. Have loved this for years.

 The photo below is what I think Id like to have.. a different Ombre..

 Kandee Johnson has a new hairstyle that is exactly it!

 Below is a picture of me and Bliss catching up on her videos lol

Check out Kandee Johnson if you never have. Shes amazing. My favorite video is called "Go Get Your Dreams & My Story" 

If I could inspire one person with this blog... then my job is done <3


Friday, June 01, 2012

What do you do to escape?

(Not a smoker, but we keep out an ash tray for guests. I always wanted to put pretty gravel in

I am always curious on what people do to escape. I know that the reason I love music is because I feel like it requires my thoughts to turn off, and enjoy the ride. I am more likely to have anxious feelings during the day without it. I wish more people liked to just sit and listen to a song without interrupting it with conversation.

If I say I want to “show you” a song or a clip.. I really want you to see it for what it really is. ALL parts included. Not just the beginning...

Talking is fun too  --Believe me I do that a lot... lol
 but there's nothing like letting that music connect you with whoever is with you..

I found out recently that there is a link between a climax --both sexually and musically in your brain. ONE of the MANY reasons why we love music, is because there is always a “climax” per say in the song and a “favorite part”. When you only hear a clip of a song, it isn’t the same…

I know this is so bad.. but when people talk or interrupt my music, I feel I have to start the whole thing over. I now know the reason why.. I need my buildup and my climax! Or Eargasm, whatever you want to call it.. but yes.. (For my ears)

Music is POWERFUL.
I listen to music for probably 2/3 or more of my day if I have the option to..

Heres the schedule
My radio wakes me with a shot of music
On the way to work – plugged in
At work – quietly playing at my workstation
At lunch – plugged in
Back at work – quietly playing at my work station
On the way home from work –pluggin in!! (yay!! One of my favorite music rides)
As soon as I am on my computer or TV when I get home or until I make dinner.  –playing on my speakers (my favorite way at home

Then once I sleep I unplug from it all. Does that not sound like an addiction right there? That's pretty often!

Back to what I was saying…

Whats your vice? An unhealthy thing? Healthy? Weird? What is your “go to” ? Is music a HUGE part of your life like it is for me?

Health and Beauty-

I still cannot figure out the balance of my hair. Most people have a "routine". Mine is all over the place. I have normal hair, but its very long and there's a lot of it. I am trying to find a shampoo & conditioner that is gentle enough to use everyday and wont dry out my scalp.

So far the best one has been head and shoulders. The conditioner has almond oil in it and it smells pretty good.

Breaking a bad habit:

I am trying soo hard not to TOUCH my hair all day. I am making the commitment to break the habit. I run my fingers through it constantly, and look for split ends.

1. It makes your hair get oily faster, because of the oils on your hands.
2. I am sure I am causing breaking by tugging on it like that all the time.
3. People see it as an annoying habit, I'm sure and probably judge me based on that (I dont care about my friends/family seeing me do it..but my job is where I do it the most, and I'm sure people see me doing it..and obviously it looks immature --like a high school girl lol).

^ lol not sure if that last one is true but its a good reason to stop it! :P 
The reason I do it is out of boredom and habit. Not a good enough reason.

I went through my whole closet again and did a clean. Undies drawer didn't get forgotten. Now I can actually find the one pair I'm looking for :) 

I am thinking about throwing another clothing swap party if people are interested! I added so many cool items to my closet last time. And my other gently used clothes went to friends who adored them. Also, I added purses, belts and tons of other accessories to the mix in case people couldn't find something their size. It helped to have at least two people the same size per friend at the swap. We also had a bunch of appetizers. Maybe this time we could have some wine too? hmmm :)

I am SOOO happy warm weather is finally making an appearance

Over and out.