Year End .. Reflecting back on 2012

About time to take down the tree!


Please listen to this new song on my blog... It has a lot of significance to this blog and would mean a lot if you would check it out.  

The current song is Young Wonder - To You

 ( I have changed the song almost once per blog entry). The previous one was called "Fast Car" Ft Kina Grannis

 I hope everyone had a great Christmas. 

Mine was so much fun.

 I got to spend it at my parents house.

We had a huge feast and some nice gifts/stockings. 

Many unexpected gifts.

 My sister, Bristol, Mom, and Chris.. being goofs. :) Christmas Day

 Bristol and I. Christmas Day

Chris and I yesterday.

My Dad and I yesterday.

Chris and I went to dinner with my dad at Olive Garden. 

It was nice seeing him and catching up.

Look at this gift from my dad.  :)

He put that picture of me and my cat on the bag! 

(music, candy and him being entirely too generous)

 How sweet is that?

Last night I was thinking back on our visit and

I felt so lucky to have this time to spend with family. 

Some people go years and years without seeing their parents/siblings. I have been lucky enough to see my dad about 4-5 times this year. 

 

With the loss of Brooke last year, and dad getting cancer this year.. I was really shocked. I cannot tell you how much I wanted to faint when he told me. It is a definite stab in the heart to hear this after what our family has already been through. I have accepted the truth and have come to realize that no matter how angry I get, or how SAD I get...it will only make matters worse to be bitter at this obstacle in life. 

The truth is, we are all ultimately struggling.. 

Every one of us has battles. 

You have to surrender at some point.

My dad had a life changing surgery this year.

I am proud to say that there is only 2 more weeks left of his chemotherapy. 

 He has come through with a smile and still has a spirit of faith. I look up to that. 

Here is a picture of (left to right)

My sister Ashley, my dad, Brooke and Me. I cherish those days too. At the time I didn't know how much I appreciated those days. I was just a happy go lucky kid.

What a beautiful moment. It really was.

This year has flown by in my mind.

 I cannot beleive I have gone through yet another year of life.  

A lot has happened... Here is this years flash back of a few things I may not have shared:

2012

-I learned that money doesn't equal happiness.

-I quit my job that wasn't bringing me joy anymore.

- I made way more recipes this year than ever.

- I got way more organized. Planner. Cooking Ideas. Closet.

-I had this overall feeling that I could never quite get close enough to anyone this year.

 I want even deeper, and even more meaningful relationships in my life. 

-I know now for sure that it takes some work to be happy.
-I dyed my hair for the first time this year.

-I am planning my first tattoo. In process of finding an artist.

-I saw 3 doctors this year. My regular physician, my 'woman doctor' and a breast doctor. That was a strange place to be. I am lucky enough to have the information/treatment that they gave me. It was not the most pleasant experience though. 

-I stopped sleeping at some point and had to be mended back to a regular functioning person again.

-My weight fluctuated for the first time since high school. I started to weigh too little, 

and then I just put a lot of it back on. 10 lbs fluctuation is a big difference to me.. It was very strange. My weight is so dependent upon my overall health. Stress makes you skinny..

- I got a hypo allergenic kitten!! Bliss. What a wonderful addition to the family.

- I went on an amazing Florida vacation with my mom and little sister.

-  I took way more photos in 2012.

Recipes 

 Organization

 How much deeper I want to be with people....

 Yup thats right. Thats a lot.. I know.


 Bliss

Beach in Florida

 Disney in Florida

Things I didn't do that I wanted to in 2012

-I told myself that I would visit a counselor. I never did do that. I couldn't bring myself to follow through with it. I thought I would. I even searched around a little bit. Instead, I chose to read encouraging books.

-I told myself that I would work out steadily through the whole year. I had leaps of exercise, but never stayed on the track as well as I wanted to. Now I have a better reason to work out.

-I still dont know how to properly french braid!

- I wanted to start my own business. It is harder than it looks. Must have $.

 

 Next year is on its way..

Whats your plans? I hope to re-visit some of the things I didn't do in 2012.

Merry Christmas Eve!

Hi!



I am so thankful to have today off. I switched shifts with someone else to get today off.

Yesterday and today have been very successful days

Chris and I did lots of cleaning and catching up around the house. We are also getting back into the exercise schedule. I forgot how good it feels to get my heart rate up.

Look at our little creeper... This was one morning this week, before I opened the blinds, I found this peeking at me.

I went through all of my current/old magazines.

I completely cleared out two different old and dwindled candles... and bought one to replace the old one. I love these candles so much. The only issue I have is when it burns down to an inch left that I cannot burn through.

Now I have some reusable jars though. wooohooo.

Good for cotton balls, q-tip, potpourri, a pillar candle...etc?

I thought this was a fun project.

All I did was put them in the freezer for at least an hour, then cut into the candle with a butter knife... it breaks up so easily! then use a wet paper towel and dish soap and water to get the soot out. I may wash mine a few more times but wont stick anything edible in there. The candle scent sticks a little bit.

My mom and I went Christmas shopping. She got me some gorgeous towels that caught my eye! I haven't ever gotten bright towels. It goes to show you that some things don't change. 

"whatever the item is....if it comes in pink.... I'll take two please"

Adore.

Everything in my life has been pointing at me to get some exercise! I have been cold 24/7 all day long most days. Bad circulation. Tiredness.... feeling like my body needs more tone. I need to move my body more. I am now joining my mom in her workouts at her jazzercise classes! If you have not done jazzercise... it is similar to aerobics, dance, weight lifting, etc. This is a wonderful gift from my mom. The classes and the shoes. I was fitted specifically for these shoes. Amazing balance and support.

Thank you so much mom! I love them. Not to mention.. They are PINK!

------------------------------------

Some things I want to do in my 20's:

-go on vacation (3-4 days at least)

-continue to be a music connoisseur and share more findings with other music fans.

-Dress up for holidays

-Stay playful...  

Speaking of staying playful...

I am working on approaching people more thoughtfully. When I am not sure how to react, then I just don't react yet. I try to give myself some time to figure it out first. I also am trying to remember that everyone is a result of how they were raised.. Their fault or not, they are the way they are to an extent. Accepting people is actually a gift to yourself. It takes away the responsibility to keep track of a "score"..

The more that I implement this into my life, the better I feel.

 

I hope you all have a very Merry Christmas! Tomorrow I will join my family for a big meal and gather to share gifts/sentiments. We are bringing a yummy dip and bacon wrapped jalapenos..stuffed with cream cheese! Oh man.

 I cant wait til the new year. I hope to get out and do something spontaneous for new years eve...!

I saw these cute sparkly shorts.... 
Then I decided I better figure out what my plans are before I string together an outfit.

Put the grace back.. Realize. Dont be too far bitter.

Gotta love the days off. That makes it an instant good day.  ;)
I feel like I have been pouring all of my energy into work. 
I was told once that you get out of it what you put in... So I am trying my best. 
There has been some point of true appreciation and some times of frustration..
But that's life.

Here is a recent outfit I had. Pretty cozy. Leggings, skirt, leopard top, and cardigan sweater. & Boots. Thank goodness for leggings.

 I would love a bath like this..  Much deeper and wider and then a table to have a book and some candles.

Here is the Christmas Tree this year if you haven't seen it yet

What else? I have been holding it in on this topic but...
 I must say..Its good to be alive. Last night and today proved that.



 (Every day should prove that but we certainly have been proven to take it for granted.)



 I must say, every time that we face people hurting other people.... There is a loss in my faith in humanity because there are people out there that exist like that. My heart goes out to the victims/families who are struggling through this heartache and time of loss. This is why OUR GRIPES of life and living do need to change. This includes myself. People need to start taking care of themselves. The mental illness is outrageous..

Lately, I haven't been sure how to slow myself down. It feels as though when I get home, the clock would move 10x as fast and that once dinner was figured out, then time for  cuddle/tv time with Chris and then off to bed we go! and we suddenly, begin again... New day already.

Being productive has always been important to me. If I am not on my way to do SOMETHING, I feel as if I am wasting time. I think this is the reason why I picture myself as being a "busy person". I am enjoying life right now for the most part except for the rushed feeling I have everywhere I go..I want to get more done in a day then is possible.

When I am at home, I feel I need to recharge my batteries. The next day, I am ready to go. Once the sun is down, I feel as if the day is over.

To replace this feeling of all this "rush"....I have to give myself some "getaway time"

If you don't care for yourself enough, you will wear yourself too thin. On Monday after work, I decided I would enjoy a free massage from covering two Saturdays for other people. They rewarded me with that. Much needed stress relief.All I needed to do was leave a tip.


We have a life with a constant schedule (with such little daylight now that the winter is here, I might add) and then we feel shorted. Everything is so planned. There is no relaxing, unless you plan it out. I hope that with recent and tragic events, there is some positivity in the end. We need to work on our own displeasures and follow what your mind thinks it needs to regain happiness.We should work on terminating the hate too. People are so quick to jump to anger.. me included. Lately, I catch myself in the process though and understand why I feel this way and what I can do to make it stop.

 

 

This month is going too fast already.
Anyone interested in going to thrift stores to find something to spiff up?!

Some ideas:
-Old frame turned into new spray painted chalkboard
-sweaters.. a million ideas on pinterest and google. (upcycling is the new term)
- Find a trinket and paint it gold.
-Theres a lot you can make of old books/magazines.

I am missing my intent to be creative and I need that in my life.
Earlier, the most 'artsy' thing I did was sing in my car... thats not enough. AT ALL! 

Chris and I at the Nuggets game (before the game started)
 

Fun stuff.

I am ready for Christmas to hurry and get here!





These made me chuckle:

 

 Hope all of you are well. 



Fashion Inspirations:

The end